This year you can change, even if change didn’t work out in 2023, 2022, and every year before.
You just have to remember that the path to meaningful change is not hopping on trends or riding motivation until you get bored and fall back into old routines.
It involves addressing your biggest blocks to change and caring for yourself along the way. Here’s how to not break promises to yourself in 2024:
Make a List of Habits and Beliefs You’d Like to Change and Fuel Them With ACTION
Similar to writing out a goal, writing out what we’d like to change makes the desire more concrete. It’s as if we’re making a contract with ourselves when we put our thoughts to paper.
Try to observe what’s keeping you stuck where you don’t want to be and list out what you’d like to change.
Here are some examples of habits you might want to adjust:
- You avoid talking to new people and forming relationships.
- You always acquiesce to what other people want without voicing what you want.
- You always exercise inconsistently before you stop going to the gym altogether.
- You cope with stress by spending too much time on the internet.
You may find that when you’re engaging in your unwanted habits, you’re acting from a specific belief.
Beliefs are at the bedrock of our habits and taking the time to write them down drums them up from your subconscious. If you pick apart your old beliefs, you can implement new behaviors.
Here are some possible underlying beliefs from the previous examples:
- You think no one wants to hear what you have to say.
- You believe that you aren’t worth having your needs met, or that people will get angry and leave you if you tell them what you want.
- You don’t feel like you deserve to be in good shape because it doesn’t match your self-image.
- You think that internet videos are not a bad addiction like drugs or alcohol and that you can stop anytime.
Once we understand our thought patterns, we can start adjusting them so that they’re closer to reality.
However, the real key to making new beliefs stick is to reinforce them with actions.
- You feel nervous speaking up, but you decide to speak anyway, even if people don’t approve.
- You express your needs to others in a healthy and effective way, even when you’re scared of what they might say.
- You do your best to make exercise a regular part of your life, and you start feeling more deserving of looking and feeling better.
- You start limiting your screen time, and you choose healthier coping behaviors like mindfulness or creative pursuits when you’re not feeling well.
When we don’t back our new beliefs with congruent behaviors, it can feel like we’re breaking promises to ourselves. This can devalue our self-worth and cause us to slip back into those old 2023 habits.
Other Major Tips for Creating Meaningful Changes In 2024
1. What’s Stopping You?
If you’re being honest with yourself, you likely know exactly what you have to do to change your life.
But for some reason, something is keeping you from it.
This could be…
- false beliefs,
- lack of information,
- friends you’ve outgrown,
- fear of failure,
- fear of success,
Or anything else.
The point is that you know what you need to do to make the most meaningful changes. You just have to decipher what the obstacles are and address those first.
2. Reconnect with Old Friends, and Make New Ones
In adult life, people can drift apart. It’s ok, it happens.
However, according to palliative care nurse Bronnie Ware, one of the most common regrets the terminally ill have in their final days is not staying in touch with their friends.
What may enrich your upcoming year is reconnecting with people you care about that you haven’t spoken to in a while.
This, along with being more proactively social, can reinvigorate your life with new experiences and possibilities.
3. Give Yourself Endless Second Chances
This one is tough, especially if you’re having trouble following through on making changes.
Because of course there will be days when you don’t follow through. You will have weak moments. You will get discouraged sometimes. The trap here is that your shortcomings cause you to turn against yourself, and you settle into the belief that you can’t change at all.
As we said before, this belief can be reinforced or proven wrong depending on your actions. But what else is important is developing patience with yourself, and a sense of compassion for what you’re trying to do.
A useful cognitive focus is to value your effort over your results. Showing up is one of the strongest things you can do, and it’s often the only thing we can control.
Self-compassion is always giving yourself another chance, no matter how many times it hasn’t worked out in the past.
4. Take It One Day at a Time
Whatever you’re trying to do, don’t put so much emphasis on how fast you get there or any immediate results.
Instead, all you need to focus on is maintaining a routine…
- Practice waking up at a particular time.
- Practice showing up to your new class.
- Practice adhering to your new schedule.
- Practice recognizing your negative thought patterns, even when they don’t dissipate right away.
You cannot predict the future. You can only adhere to your new set of guidelines for the changes you’re trying to make. Anything else would be applying too much pressure.
5. Consider That It’s Joy You Might Need
When we think of meaningful changes, we think of effort, overcoming weaknesses, and growing through adversity.
But maybe you’re already doing that. Maybe you’re already exceptionally good at pushing yourself and getting things done.
If that’s the case, then perhaps the most meaningful change you can make in 2024 is to let yourself feel more joy.
You can do this by…
- Giving yourself the occasional break.
- Picking up an old hobby you once loved.
- Scheduling time for enjoyment into your schedule in addition to work and goal-crushing.
- Focusing on cultivating your well-being at the expense of some productivity.
- Spend more time with friends and family.
Meaningful Changes Are Never Easy, But They Are Possible
Whatever you need to do to make this year special, you can make it happen.
Focus on your beliefs, habits, coping mechanisms, and keeping yourself healthy, and you’ll get where you’re trying to go.
If you or someone you know is in need of support, we’re here to help.
Schedule a free consultation with one of our expert psychologists and take the first step towards healing and growth.
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